6:15am: My first alarm goes off. I shut it off and go back to sleep.
6:20am: My second alarm goes off. I shut it off and stare at my phone for the next 3 minutes.
6:28am: I have finally risen from my bed and make my way across the hall to the bathroom.
6:46am: My teeth are brushed, my face is washed, I am wearing plain blue jeans and a beige shirt from Zara and have decided not to do my hair or make up, so I have all of my hair piled into a really crappy bun at the top of my head. I throw my make up bag into my purse just in case. The make up case squishes the poptart and pack of Oreos that are already in there.
7:00am: My first alarm warning its almost time to go goes off. I am not amused.
7:07am: my second alarm letting me know it is time to leave goes off. I am still not amused but this time I am sitting on my couch waiting for it.
7:09am: I leave my house and head to my car to get up the block to the bus stop. I am lazy.
7:16am: The bus gets to the bus stop. I am the third person on the entire bus. I take off my sunglasses, say good morning to the driver and take my seat in the middle of the bus.
7:16 1/2am: I fall asleep.
7:42am: A pregnant lady wakes me up so that she can sit next to me. I apologize for having my bag there, put it on my lap, and fall back to sleep while hugging a baby pack of Kleenex.
8:24am: My bus exits the Lincoln Tunnel, I am woken up by the change in lighting on the bus.
8:36am: I jump off the bus and wrestle my way down 3 blocks to the Starbucks.
8:52am: I am the fourth person in the office. Go Team.
10:32am: I die when I realize its only 10:32am.
10:41am: I take my second dose of Advil Cold & Sinus Liqui-Gels.
11:25am: I get 13 emails from the same person and die a second time.
12:42pm: I have eaten half a pack Goldfish Pretzels. I regret nothing.
1:24pm: Everything anyone says to me bothers me. I am ready to go home.
1:41pm: I must look miserable because someone gave me cookies.
1:50pm: I need real people food. But First, I need to go to the post office.
2:22pm: Just googled “how to make a manchild get organized” from my phone because my boyfriend is an airhead.
2:42pm: Just got in line for a free Chick-Fil-A sandwich. AND got a cow!
2:51pm: Finally got my sandwich and headed back to the office. I’m the happiest person alive.
3:02pm: I take a “knockout” shot from the Juice Shop that is supposed to help with my immune system. I immediate regret it.
3:14pm: I’m given a HUGE project filled with things I’ve never done before and I begin to freak out because its due tomorrow. Pray for me guys.
4:30pm: I still have no idea what I’m doing with this project. This is sucking.
4:45pm: I’ve been on the phone with a woman from Baltimore for 10 minutes now trying to figure out this project. I am still very lost.
5:09pm: Crammed myself in an elevator going down to the lobby. Ignored the girl behind me who’s headphones were blasting a hysterically inappropriate song. Definitely time to go home.
5:13pm: Bumped into my mom’s best friend’s husband who I never see but saw about 53 hours ago and then again now.
5:20pm: Jumped on a train to go up one stop to my bus stop. Again, I am lazy.
5:22pm: Got to the bus stop.
5:27pm: A man is standing very close to me while trying out new ring tones on his flip phone. I’m obviously being punished for something.
5:36pm: Finally got a bus.
5:54pm: Entered the Lincoln tunnel. This is going to be a very long ride home.
6:11pm: The lady next to me just pulled out a pack of peanut M&Ms and isn’t even sharing. Super rude.
6:41pm: I just realized the bus driver and the lady sitting in the first seat are possibly discussing the bus driver’s son who he doesn’t know and who possibly lives in Korea with the driver’s ex and her new husband. VERY strange conversation happening.
7:02pm: Off the bus. ALIVE.
7:43pm: Just got to eat half a pack of Oreos after dinner and am watching modern family. I am ready for bed.
8:02pm: I killed a giant mosquito. And I’m rewarding myself with an NCIS episode.
8:58pm: a bus blew up on NCIS.
This is getting awfully tedious. So this was my day, free chicken and all. I hope you didn’t think this was super annoying. Happy Tuesday!