I’ve been in a really weird mood lately and I couldn’t figure out why.
A girl I know posted this picture on Instagram and it kinda hit me. I think I’m so unhappy because I don’t have a goal.
My whole life I’ve been working toward something feasible; working toward the summer, working toward college, working toward graduation, and finally I’ve achieved all of that. I’m done.
So now what?
What do I have to look forward too?
What am I working for?
What the hell is my life’s plan?!
I have no idea.
Every day I do the same thing, the monotony is killing me… That and the fact that I really don’t have anything to work for anymore.
My dad used to tell me you should always have goals… his goals were usually working for enough money to buy a certain car or afford a certain watch. But working for something material just doesn’t cut it for me.
I’m not judging him; working toward anything is hard and should be supported and rewarded.
But I don’t want a car or a watch… Ok I do want a watch, but it’s $30k and like fuck that, no.
What I want is to do nothing, to travel around with a backpack and a book and watch the sun rise and meet a little wild fox or something.
Don’t get me wrong, I can be very materialistic. But honestly, I don’t care at this point. I wanna run away and go camping in the mountains. I wanna pet a furry cow and go fishing on a Great Lake (during the summer of course because I’m pretty sure they’re all frozen right now.)
I just wanna figure out how to be happy!


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